maitrī karuṇāmuditopekṣāṇāṃ sukhaduḥkhapuṇyāpuṇya viṣayāṇāṃ bhāvanātaścittaprasādanam॥ PYS 1.33॥
maitrī the essence of friendship; karuṇā, compassion; muditā, a joyful condition of mind; upekkṣāṇaṁ, seeing without judgement; sukha, happiness; duḥkha, pain, sorrow; puṇya, virtue; apuṇya, lack of virtue; viṣayāṇāṁ, in relation to; bhāvanātaḥ, by contemplating; citta-prasādanam, transparency of mind
infusing the mind with friendliness, compassion, cheerfulness, and uninvolved observation in relation to those living a happy, miserable, virtuous, and non-virtuous life respectively, results in reclaiming a pristine state of mind.
The key to this practice is non-judgment and detachment.
When we can free ourselves of being the judge, juror, and sentencer, who banishes those we do not or cannot understand to the margins of our lives. If we can release the tendency to gather support from others, seeking unison in our judgments, to then cast a fellow soul collectively to the desert of no love. We then also free ourselves and those we judge from the pain and suffering caused by a lack of skill in living as a compassionate soul.
From the time we are children we are taught by example to love some and not others. Those we choose not to love we see as somehow innately flawed and not worthy of our love. What we are not taught is to look within ourselves and see the flaw of not being able to love indiscriminately as being our own. Ultimately those we cast aside reflect our own inability to live with a free and open mind and heart. Both have been tainted by conditioning. In so doing we not only rob another of the energy of unconditional positive regard we also harm ourselves.
Have you ever sat with someone capable of such a fullness of love no one is excluded? They are joyous, spontaneous, free, and uplifting to all. They exude an energy that is infectious, and we want to be near them.
As we sit with the evidence of our ‘not love’ toward another and upon further reflection, we find our ability to love, and care is strangely obstructed. As we follow this tendency to its root along the way we discover we are incapable of even loving ourselves and so cast that shadow and emptiness upon others. We are always seeking to fill our feelings of emptiness and unfulfillment and so will not give fullness to others either.
We cannot know another until we truly know ourselves. This is not a call to psychotherapy it is instead a call to Self-Inquiry. Who am I? ……the question we do not answer with the mind but wait patiently for that which abides at the very root of our being to reveal itself. The practices and teachings of yoga guide us to this revelation by generating the essential stillness and quietude to allow that meeting with the truth of our existence.
A free mind, a mind that dwells in its own prasad (gift) of its pristine peaceful undisturbed joyous nature is a mind that can reflect a full-hearted soul and extend only the blessing of full compassionate feeling toward all. Such a soul is nearing the end of its journey through lives and times, it is nearing its own eternality. When concern for me and small self, when things cease to be prefaced with an I we near the wonderful release of the suffering that binds fear and forgetfulness to us.
Along the way we practice freedom!!!!
When we meet another, someone we find difficult to love, pause, breathe, contemplate love, let it transform the energy of irritation and disturbance. In doing so we find the shadow that covers the heart and mind recedes.
You see we are trained to love a few; the significant other, family (sometimes), friends, maybe our teachers and guides. We are not trained to love ourselves, to practice self-compassion, and by doing so release others of our projected expectations of perfection. We are not trained to love all as the same exquisite refection of beauty and perfection inherent within all creation. We are taught to abide in our separate nature and to see the other as just that other and potentially someone to be feared or excluded from our circle of safety and mutual agreements.
Compassion has several stages of development
1. To see another who is suffering and acknowledge that suffering in our own minds and then turn away and go about our lives and think no more of it. A momentary glimpse of compassion within us. (at least it is there, friendliness is there, we have not as yet learned to exude it toward all and always)
2. To see another’s suffering and give a smile, a moment’s kindness and then turn away as it is too much to feel so much pain empathically. It causes us pain.
3. To see another’s suffering and unreservedly step in to do what needs to be done to alleviate that suffering.
4. Remembering all who suffer daily and give all the benefits of our personal practice to their upliftment and live each moment as an expression of that full-hearted joyous friendship toward all.
PRACTICE
Sit quietly in a comfortable seated position
Feel the support beneath you with gratitude, give all the tension of the lower body into the ground. Relax and soften into your seat.
Feel your spine light and elongated extending from base to crown.
Feel your chest open and expanded.
Feel your heart soften.
Feel your shoulders lighten and lower away from your ears.
Feel the breath -The sweetness of the inhalation and fullness and ease of the exhalation.
Observe the breath for several moments. Relish the breath!
As your attention turns inward and the body has stilled and relaxed and the mind grows calm and present-
Turn your observation toward the mind itself
Feel the state of the mind
Seek within the mind its capacity to extend friendship to all including yourself.
Practice the bhavana of friendliness toward all and everything
Abide in the feeling of friendliness
Seek lovingness and compassion within the mind as you wash the mind with the subtle depths of the breath. Give it to yourself, extend it to all everyone, and everything
Spend a few moments contemplating those you find it harder to love, don’t think about them – simply see them or feel them, extend the purest love toward them - raise your capacity to extend the purest fullest feeling of love toward them and to all. Give them your light, give them the feeling of an unburdened heart and mind.
Abide in the purity of such a mind for as long as it feels natural.
Seal the completion of your practice with your own commitment to live as such a heart.
Bring your palms together in front of your heart and breath three very full slow breaths.
Repeat if you wish Om shanti, shanti, shantihi (love to the body, the mind and the world)
As an extension of this practice - Next time someone irritates you try the yoga of reversal (pratipaksha bhavana), turn the feeling of irritation into acceptance, understanding, and loving compassion. The one who lives free of animosity is truly free.
Next time you find yourself giving yourself a hard time remember to breathe gently and fully and allow love to abide in the mind even toward yourself. Love your mind with your breath, free your heart with your breath. Conscious breath is a tool toward freedom. Infuse the mind with friendliness, compassion, cheerfulness, and detachment from the sources of irritation or agitation. It is possible!
Our teacher told us to “take a broom and sweep the heart”
Awaken the spiritual heart and it will heal the human heart.
Yoga is Skill in Action